It has been a while since the prototype development of the first generation of navigation software called Beacon designed for individuals with visual impairments. I am honored that I can really communicate with them as a sighted person, and understand and enter their lives to a certain extent. However, gradually, I began to realize that I did not actually enter their hearts, and I gradually became very curious about their inner thoughts.
Coincidentally, our school launched the Major Foundation Program (MFP) during this period, which is a 6-week research project that allows each group of students to conduct research in the field of their choice under the guidance of teachers in related disciplines. Although the time for this project is indeed tight and it is difficult to conduct a very "grand" research, it can indeed lay a foundation for the direction in which each student is interested, and continue to improve the research in the future based on the results of the MFP.
Recently, a very obvious phenomenon has emerged in our grade, that is, more and more students are entering into romantic relationships. Every day during breaks, lunch time, and even after school, couples can be seen slowly getting closer to each other on campus. Some of these relationships are immature, some are mature. But no matter what the form, the development of these emotions seems to be based on a kind of "visibility" - we see each other's appearance, actions, expressions, and even a glance can become a catalyst for the relationship between the two.
It is this kind of "seeing" that makes me start to think more deeply: If "seeing" is part of our love, then how is love perceived in the invisible world?
Individuals with visual impairments do not have vision, the most intuitive medium, to perceive and judge a person, so how do they choose a partner? Do they rely more on sound, smell, conversation, or even touch and spiritual resonance? These are often placed at the bottom of the dating standards of so-called “sighted people". When I observed that my peers frequently mentioned "appearance", "height", "temperament" and other mate selection standards in their dating process, I realized that we rarely think seriously about the essence of a person who is truly "worthy of love".
Therefore, I decided to focus the MFP research on how this special group - individuals with visual impairments - view the choice of "love" and "partner". I want to know: in a world where vision is lost but perception is more delicate and three-dimensional, is love closer to the "essence"? Does it place more emphasis on the heart, personality and real connection? I believe that from their stories, we cannot only have a deeper understanding of the emotional world of the visually impaired, but it may also help us redefine the meaning of "love".
This time, Lin and I were in a team for MFP. We looked up a lot of research on the mate selection criteria and love of visually impaired people, and found that most of them were studied from the perspective of sighted people rather than from the perspective of individuals with visual impairments. Realizing these gaps, we decided to make it more "humane" and considerate.
We finally contacted a total of 5 visually impaired people through the Institute of Accessibility Development at Tsinghua University and Professor Liang from our school, and conducted interviews with them. The results of the interviews with these 5 visually impaired people actually shocked me. For example, one of them mentioned that visually impaired people also pay attention to the appearance of the partner, etc. These contents are actually difficult to imagine from the perspective of a sighted person.
After in-depth conversations with these individuals with visual impairments, I gradually realized that the so-called "invisible" is actually the boundary set by our usual cognitive framework. We always think that vision is the main entrance to understand the world, but in their stories, I feel another dimension of reality - love is no longer the result of "seeing", but a process of "being understood", "being respected" and "being supported".
One interviewee said that he would ask his friends to describe the other person's appearance, and the voice, tone, and perception of details also became the basis for judgment. But even so, what he emphasized was never "good-looking", but "suitable", "practical", and "able to go on together". This made me reflect: In our society that emphasizes visual symbols, is our love too superficial? Is it too easy to be kidnapped by the "visible" appearance and ignore the "invisible" essence - whether a person is sincere, willing to accompany, and whether he will stick with you at the critical moment?
We always say "love is blind", but I now understand that for them, love is not blind, but an active perception, the ability to carefully distinguish tenderness, kindness and reliability in complex life. This ability is exactly what we often lack in an environment dominated by vision.
I was deeply influenced and touched. This experience made me value the power of communication even more, and also gave me a new understanding of the definition of "love". Perhaps, true intimacy does not come from the stunning first sight, but the determination to walk side by side after understanding each other's unique situation.